Cry
by ChaosIsMyTrueLover
Summary: Post series, Roy tries to deal with Ed's absence. A couple of spoilers for ep. 52.
1. Cry

Cry

I don't own Roy, Ed, or Al...lucky for them too. There might be a second part to this in the works, but no promises, and I'm warning you...I'm a tease.

It had been a long time since Roy had really cried. When he'd woken up in the hospital he'd been in terrible pain, but he'd taken it. Only later when he found out that his lover, Edward Elric, had disappeared beyond the Gate had the war with tears begun. He'd tried to stay strong in front of his friends when they'd come to visit him, but finally, he thought it was sometime while Havoc was there, he'd broken down. The next few days passed in a blur of sedation an tears during which he was never fully sure what was going on. Doctors came in and out running tests and sticking needles in him, and occasionally he thought he heard Riza somewhere nearby. Whenever he felt fairly sure she was really there he asked for Ed. Riza (or someone he imagined to be Riza) would patiently explain that the younger man was gone and probably wouldn't be coming back any time soon. Then Roy would sob until the drugs knocked him out again. He guessed it was about a week after his battle with Pride that the doctors decided to stop drugging him. He laid in bed for a long time staring at the ceiling and trying to block Ed out of his mind. The way the other had smiled and laughed, how they had teased each other, and the way it had felt when Ed made love to him. He refused to eat or see anyone and those who were close to him started to fear he would die. Finally a visitor arrived unannounced. He refused to be deterred by any of the hospital staff and barged into Roy's room while the older man was in the middle of one of his worse spells.

"Mustang-sama?" he voice was somewhat familiar, but different somehow. Still, Roy knew only one person who could sound so sweet and worried.

"Al?" he sat up a little and was shocked to see a blond ten year old standing beside his bed.

"Your…your body…"

"Yeah, brother got it back for me…" Al looked at the ground, refusing to meet Roy's eyes.

"I'm going to bring him back" he said finally "I promise. If I'd known this would happen I would have never agreed to search for the Stone. Brother can be so reckless sometimes…I know he didn't mean to hurt you like this. Even when he was a thousand miles from you he always said how much he loved you."

Roy forced a small smile at Al. The boy smiled back, tears pooling in his bright eyes. Roy opened his arms and Al fell gratefully into the embrace. And for the first time he could remember Roy didn't cry alone.


	2. Miss You

Chapter 2: Miss You

Thanks to my buddy Kara for the review! glomp This chapter is for her, cause she wanted me to write it. Hope you like!

Oh yes, and I haven't seen Conqueror of Shambala yet, so I'm going out on a limb. Who the heck knows how darling Ed gets back to his beloved Roy? People in Japan I suppose…And just a warning. This is sappy fluff. Like cotton candy. It'll rot your teeth with it's sickening sweetness. This is not a low calorie fic.

I don't own Roy or Ed, but I still can ask: Roy, Ed, why don't you have some dirty hot sex with me?

_Where are you and I'm so sorry  
I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight  
I need somebody and always  
This sick strange darkness comes creeping on so haunting everytime_

-Blink 182, Miss You

* * *

Time passed in slowly in Central City. Since Roy had been demoted he hadn't had much to do. He saw his friends from the old days often enough, but things felt different somehow. He could tell when they looked at him it wasn't without pity. He'd suffered through a month long relationship with Riza a couple of years back, but they had agreed to break it off. Roy's heart just wasn't in it. Over the years pictures of him together with Ed faded, but time did nothing to heal the pain of losing him. Al had gone back home to train further, and he wrote occasionally. One day a letter arrived announcing Al's engagement to his childhood friend Winry and inviting Roy to Resembool to celebrate. Roy was slightly surprised that Al had committed so young, but then, Ed had only been 13 himself when his relationship with Roy had started. Ed…It appeared there would be no wedding day for him or his lover. Roy didn't know if he could stand to visit the place where he'd fist seen his beloved, but decided it wouldn't be fair to Al to refuse. The next day he boarded a train for the country town. It was a long enough trip that he had a hard time staying awake for it all. He didn't want to fall asleep though. Most nights when he could sleep at all he woke up screaming, visions of how his life had been fresh in his mind. When he finally arrived it was the middle of the night. Despite that Al and Winry were at the station to greet him. Roy got off the train and Al insisted on taking his bag. The older man forced a smile. Winry took his hand and lead him down the path to the home she now shared with Al. They were good people. Roy had known that for a long time, but somehow being with them made him feel worse. He remembered the time two years ago when he had cried in the hospital with Al. It was the last time he'd let anyone see any emotion, but now he felt the barriers he'd worked so hard to build up threatening to break. When they arrived home he hurried to his room and locked the door. When he turned on the lights he saw the walls were covered with pictures. Some of the faces he recognized, and one in particular caught his eye. Going over to take a closer look he realized what it was of. As he stared, the face of a 13 year old Edward grinned back at him. Roy's arm was wrapped protectively around his shoulder, and Al was in the back, towering over both of them as was typical when he'd been armor. Roy didn't seem to be able to force himself to take in enough oxygen. He sunk to the floor, trembling.

"Edward…" he whispered "why did it have to turn out like this?"

"It's really not as bad as you think." a familiar voice said. Roy felt someone wrap their arms around him. He looked up to see who was holding him.

"No…this isn't real." But Ed looked real enough. His golden blond hair was longer than before and he seemed a bit taller, despite that there could be no doubt about his identity.

Roy's trembling fingers dared to brush Ed's cheek. He felt warm and alive.

"It's not possible."

"Don't count too much on that, Mustang. We always were a couple of skeptics though."

Lips were pressed gently to his own. Roy didn't try to deepen the kiss, still to shocked to move. Ed ran his tongue over Roy's lips and the older willingly opened his mouth, letting his lover explore. Then Roy was holding Ed tight, afraid he might slip away again.

"I don't care if it's not real" he sobbed "I love you."

"It's real." Ed whispered, his voice betraying as much emotion as his own tears.

"I'm never going to let you go again."

"I'd never leave your side even if you did."

He rocked them both gently, trying to comfort Roy. The darker haired man didn't try to stop crying, content to let all the emotions he'd held back for so long flow out. His tears mixed with his lover's when they kissed, until finally both men were exhausted. Ed pulled a blanket off the bed and wrapped it around them, knowing Roy was too tired to move, even to get into bed. Roy couldn't remember the last time he'd slept as well as he did that night, cradled in Ed's arms.

* * *

A few hours later Al transmuted the lock on Roy's door and peaked inside. He wasn't surprised to find his friend and older brother fast asleep, holding each other as tight as they could. Part of him felt guilty about not telling Roy about Ed's return a week ago when the older of the brothers had shown up suddenly with only sketchy memories of the past two years. He knew it had been for the best though. Now Roy would never need to cry again. 


End file.
